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Ah, interesting. We get a little look inside Slipstream's CPU. This is probably a conversation he wasn't comfortable having with a human, that's for sure. Far too different in their worldviews and cultural complexities.13th July 2014
20:56 GMT +5:30
"So, ah, yeah." The white Autobot with electric blue decals slumps slightly, his right arm dropping from where he was gesturing to go limp on the table. "He means a lot to Arcee, but he doesn't seem to like me at all."
I smile, and he starts looking uncomfortable.
Heh. Enjoying Wall-E? I wonder if the subtleties of the plot make it through her cultural lens. What with all the AI units and conforming to/breaking out of their roles..."See, I know the War's over and everything, but I still get a little nervous when I see a 'con smile like that."
One of me… One of my bodies, the body with all the essential bits in it is sitting in the workshop with Tailgate, Arcee's newly resurrected partner. Tortured to death by that psycho Airachnid, and now wondering why Jack doesn't want to have him on their team. // I'm also watching a film about a little drone driving around a spaceship filled with fat humans. Two channels, one me.
Ah, one of those talks. Fortunately, Slipstream has enough experience with humans to set him right on a few details, at least."How do you think I feel about letting a couple of Autobots into my home?"
He thinks that over and then shrugs, relaxing slightly. "So… What am I doing wrong?"
"You know, Paul told me this would happen, but I honestly didn't think it would happen this quickly."
"Paul. That's your… Human business partner-."
I would laugh if she said 'Surprisingly well.' but deep down, there's bound to be friction."Conjunx endura."
"Oh. I'd… Heard something about-." He shakes his head, then looks at me curiously. "I gotta ask: how does that work?"
Oh, boy. Are we about to see an expression much like TF:A Optimus when Sari gave him the 'talk'?"He got a lot of Nebulon implants, I got a avatar module."
He frowns. "What for? You can talk to him just fine as you are. He's the one who needed a modification to feel your spark." His frown deepens. "Do humans have a spark? Is there an adaptor?"
Got to be fun having a body where you can do all those little reactions that you wouldn't do to someone;'s face.I snort with my avatar, prompting Paul to look at her/me. I have her/me wave his concern off. "Given where we are, I think we're lucky they don't."
"Oooh, right." He nods. "Unicron. Do Unicron's creatures have sparks?"
Hmm... Have she and Pull done those things yet? The fun things that confuse cybertronians so much."I don't know. We usually don't leave enough in one piece to tell for sure, and Axlegrease isn't really a researcher."
"Fair enough. So why'd you get an avatar?"
I won't go linking to it, but look up the 'Autobutts' series from TheBootyDoc. They seem to manage. And nice name-drop of Seaspray, who in G1 got to briefly experience life as a fleshling..."Because humans have their own bonding rituals and traditions, and they're… Some of them are hard to do when we're this physically different."
"Okay, I guess that makes sense." And I can't help but smile. He.. doesn't get it. It's… Huh. Yeah, it's a shame that Seaspray didn't survive. It would be nice to have someone to compare notes with. "But what's that got to do with me and Jack?"
A reminder that it's not just the Autobots that lost friends, there..."Basically, transformer teams are between four and six transformers, right?"
"I've seen a couple that had eight, and when your team mates start dying-. Yeah, okay, I know what you mean. What about it?"
And the whole 'human sparklings' thing is gonna be fun to explain..."To put it simply, human teams are two, plus the sparklings they're mentoring. They work with other humans, but by their standards that's a different kind of relationship."
He frowns. "Why?"
Oh, about a 50-50 chance of them having one, yes."It's to do with how their-. How they make new humans by combining biological data inside the humans with an internal fabricator."
"An internal-?" He stares. "Is that common?"
Hmm... Wonder how long an average Cybertronian frame takes to construct? You know, typical car-former size?"It's about half of them. You'll learn to spot them once you've been here a while. Humans don't live as long as we do, so they have to build their replacements faster." I shake my head. "If you really want to know the details, you can talk to Paul about it. My avatar is with him right now if you want me to ask him to come here."
And to them it probably sounds kind of silly. But to Jack, being a teenage boy, it's the end of the world."No, that's… Fine." He looks thoughtful. "So Jack doesn't like me, because if I'm Arcee's partner then he can't be."
"Pretty much."
Or like her and Pull, to give it a different spin."Heh." He smiles. "Silly human. How do I tell him he's full of crude?"
"Basically, you can't. It's instinctive, like transforming is for us. If Arcee had called you her team mate, or squad mate, or an old friend, that would have been fine." Probably. "Partner implies that you've got a one-to-one relationship, like how theirs are."
Well, depending on the council's willingness to experiment with reviving them... Yeah, I suspect they'd be effectively perma-ded.His face gets a bit broody, something I've seen Nova Storm do after a few quarts of high grade. "Everyone else on Team Delta got turned into Terrorcons, so they won't be coming back."
I raise my own mug in salute. "'til all are one."
Especially with Megatron more or less scattering Dark Energon all around on Cybertron at one point.He nods, and tilts his own towards me. "You?"
I nod back. "Probably. Most of them, definitely. We won't know until we go through all of the wreckage. Nothing either of us can do about it now."
Well, not taller, but they do thicken up a little in some cases. Looking at you, Agent Fowler."No. But I can do something about Arcee and Jack." His eyes narrow thoughtfully. "Do humans get a lot bigger as they age?"
"No."
Ah, so she is considered 'not-cybertronian', then, being a Junkion. Have to wonder how her people came about. Old, forgotten colony world, perhaps?"Are they stronger than they look?"
"I don't have much contact with other aliens." Except Axlegrease, but she's got to be at least ninety percent transformer by now. "They're a lot weaker and squishier than us."
I suspect that had a bigger impact on her than she likes to show. Same with Arcee..."So… Huh. Okay, so what exactly does your human partner do?"
"He gave me a reason to go on living. Something to do with my life that wasn't fighting a war I didn't really care about any more. Did Arcee tell you a lot about Jack?"
Unless he was using the Apex Armour, I doubt it..."Yeah, a few things."
"Did any of it involve the two of them fighting side by side?"
Yeah, that is a lot more meaningful to her than she likes to let on, then."Not… Exactly. He could sneak in places where she'd have been spotted, and… She smiles a lot when she talks about spending time with him exploring the Earth or just hanging out with him." He nods slowly. "Stuff that has nothing to do with the War."
"Paul helped me be a person. Everything I've done since I met him… These are the first things I did… Free. Free of Megatron or that sump sucker Straxus. Do you even remember what you did before the War?"
Ironic, given that in most continuities, he is a Decepticon."Secure courier. I don't think I'll go back to it, though." He looks at me… What is that? Sympathy? "If I'd been working for Straxus I'd have joined the Decepticons, too. He was the worst."
"No. But he was close."
Including the things that make her avatar form get red-faced?"If you say so. So, is there any reason why I wouldn't want Arcee to be-. To have Jack as a human-type partner?"
"A lot of the things I do with Paul are… Human-bonding things. Things that would seem… Weird to most transformers because we don't work like that. Jack wants to do those things with Arcee."
Ironic, given the design of her holo-avatar 'Sadie', she of the tight racing suit. Probably one of the things that got Jack's attention in the first place.He thinks for a moment, then shrugs. "Does she want to do those things with him?"
"I don't think she understands exactly what they are."
I suppose having her Avatar display the reaction she wanted to saves on refinishing the floor..."Could you demonstrate for her?"
//
"Slipstream? Are you okay?"
...Because that would scratch the hell out of it and her finish.My body-. I'm-. My avatar body is doing that-. Laughing, on the… Floor? Paul's looking down at me. I manage to get my right arm under control and point it towards the refectory. "Tailgate asked if-. Hah! If we could demonstrate human-transformer 'things' for Arcee." Shockwave's programming makes it/me gasp for a breath I don't need, but that need feels… Weirdly good and… Appropriate, somehow?
Man, Humans are going to be a bit of a memetic hazard for some 'bots, aren't they?Paul sighs. "Or we could just explain them first."
What was it that human in that said? "'No one can be told what the Matrix is.' Or in our case what it feels like to have your T-cog adapt your body for human bonding practices."
Yeah, save the practical demonstrations for another time. Or direct Tailgate so certain websites. ...They must have some seriously good internet filtering going on if he hasn't found that stuff yet."I think I'd like to try starting by telling her."
"Okay." // "We could."
For Jack? Heh. It might remind him a bit of Silas, but I think he'd enjoy feeling so powerful.Tailgate looks confused. Of course, he's got even less understanding than Arcee.
"But you should probably clear the air with Jack first."
And maybe we should talk to Shockwave about getting him a transtector body prepared as well.
Yes. That is what 'high grade' is a reference to.I wonder if transformers can get drunk or high? It can be a bonding experience between them and the squishy biologicals
The term 'gender' only exists for them in the field of xenolinguistics. Radical physical transformations are considered a bit odd and there might be problems regarding what a weak spark can support, but if Tailgate just wanted to be a slightly more rounded car, that would be within the bounds of normal.I wonder how locked in Transformer 'genders' are. Give Tailgate a smoother chassis and a different voice file and this whole problem might just poof away.
You're being picky. That's an eight out of ten.
Honestly, that's the sort of system I'd expect to be integrated into a frame regardless of alt-mode. Guess it was too energy-hungry for Earth use. Like G1 Tracks, and his 'flying car' sub-mode. Funny how many G1 bots had that sort of partial mistransformation as a 'battle mode' or the like, actually...13th July 2014
22:27 GMT +5:30
"…keeping his bumper clean. Don't think I've forgotten how bad an influence on you he was."
Ah, the directional microphone. And being bonded to its owner so that if you close your eyes a little you can hear and see what's happening as if you were there. Perfect for eavesdropping on personal conversations just in case they've actually done the mature adult thing and had an open and honest conversation about their feelings. Slipstream is usually too noisy to take advantage of it, but since she changed back from 'Earth jet' to 'Cybertronian interceptor' she's been able to include an anti-gravity system that lets her hover or fly slowly but silently.
To be fair, that's not a high bar to clear, from what I hear."That was one time."
They've parked up on the side of a mountain near our base, and are just staring out into the dark. For obvious reasons we sited the base a decent distance away from inhabited areas, but not far enough to make the commute impossible. There are several towns within driving distance, and the new roads that were put in as part of the cost of us basing ourselves here are some of the best in India.
Right, maybe now they'll get down to the meat of it... But probably won't.Not that that's saying much…
"Bulkhead's as happy as I've ever seen him working on reconstruction with the vehicons. And Ratchet's working with the Last Autobot preparing wrecks for resurrection. And I still want to know why you have a problem with Tailgate."
I'm sure you're using far worse words in your head, of course. Much to her amusement."I don't have a problem with Tailgate! It's just-. You know, I haven't seen you for months-"
In Slipstreams rear cockpit seat, I roll my eyes. "Oh, for goodness sake."
Ah, adolesence. When the fear of being childish overwhelms you, and the ever-present desire for a maturity that always seems so far out of reach...In the front seat, little Slipstream glances back. "Why isn't he just telling her?"
"Because he's a teenager whose physical maturity has rushed ahead of his mental maturity. And he's actually more mature than Miko."
Ah, someone else sick of them playing 'dance around the issue'? And sometimes, the perfect person for the job..."-and I was hoping-."
Their parking area is suddenly illuminated, and then there's a-
...Is someone with no fucks to give, and knows how to smack his old friend upside the helm until they come around.TSCHE-CHU-CHU-CHU-TSCHE!
-noise as… Tailgate transforms and walks closer. "Hey there!"
Sure, three's a crowd, but this time, a crowd is needed.
Just don't get confused and lose attitude control if you start laughing."No, no, it's okay." Tailgate raises his right hand in a dismissive motion. "I just got done having Slipstream explain a whole lot about human relationships to me, and I want to be completely clear."
Mini-Slipstream snort. "This should be good."
And that was with him plugged into her processor cores."You're the one who taught him."
"There's only so much I can do in a day. It took you a lot longer to explain things to me."
I suppose there was also the risk of being, you know, crushed underfoot if she took exception."I thought that coming on too strong when I was the first person you'd spoken to in years wasn't really on."
Below us, Jack folds his arms defensively across his chest. "Okay?"
Sadly, there's no really way to get on a human's level for a regular-sized bot. The joy of being three or four times a human's size.Tailgate crouches down, probably trying to reduce the height different but really just emphasising it. "Arcee's my partner in the same way that human police officers have partners, or human soldiers work in fireteams. We work together, and we're good friends. Like she is with Bulkhead and Bumblebee."
Now, Cliffjumper might have felt a little more strongly, but, well... He's not here."Right?"
"Now, I've never had any kinda conjunx so I can't honestly say I know what that's like, but I don't think about Arcee differently to how I thought about all the other 'bots on our team."
Arcee gives him an unamused look. "Thanks, Tailgate."
Ha! That'd be on par with his mother talking about this stuff. Awkwardness is the natural state of teenagers, after all."Okay, maybe a little closer because we usually teamed up when Delta Team split into pairs-. What I mean is, how I think about Arcee is like that and not like something else. As far as I'm concerned, you can try and do your human bonding thing and it's all good."
Jack was very clearly not ready to hear it that directly. And from the way her eyebrows just shot up I'm not.. completely sure that Arcee was either.
Tailgate bringing that slightly-teasing older brother energy. Smoothing some of the social bumps, only to raise new ones."Excuse me?"
But at least Jack's relaxed his arms. "Okay. That-. Thank you?"
At least he respects the code of the bro-fist."No problem!" Tailgate extends his right fist towards Jack and watches him expectantly.
Jack takes a moment, glances at the increasingly bewildered Arcee and then taps his own right fist against the far larger intermediate phalange of Tailgate's ring finger.
Besides, he turns into a cool muscle car. What's to hate about that for a teenager boy?
I can just imagine her giving him the 'knock it off, dumb-aft...' look."Glad to hear it!" He stands up and turns around. "Arcee, my purely platonic partner?"
"Yeah?"
And now the 'Thanks ever so much' look. I'm sure you can picture them..."I got nothing to say about this situation at all. You're even further off the map than usual."
"Thanks, Tailgate."
Dude even knows when to give them their space. Great bro.
...Sadly, neither of them are really adult in that sense. One is too nervous to broach the subject, the other doesn't even know what the subject really is...I nod. "Now that's the adult way to handle things. Polite, direct, leaving no room for misunderstanding. Not letting things fester."
Slipstream and I watch and Jack and Arcee awkwardly avoid looking at each other.
Not really enough people around for a big song-and-dance number. And I doubt either of them are in the right place for a quiet duet..."Shouldn't they start singing about now?"
"I told you, Indian daytime television rots your brain module. We should go-."
TSCHE-CHU-CHU-CHU-TSCHE!
at least she can safely transform with passengers. Some bots aren't that skilled...I can feel her intent… And her location relative to me as I start to fall. So this time I don't even react, just lifting my right arm slightly to that it's easier for her to grab me before I can gain momentum. Slipstream's other hand grabs her avatar as she controls her descent, falling through the air for a few moments before landing lightly in front of Arcee and Jack. Arcee's arms jerk up, but she controls her reaction before her guns pop out, which is a major improvement. Slipstream spots that and smiles before putting her avatar and me on the ground.
Yes, perhaps she's starting to connect the dots. And maybe get ideas."This is an intervention." / "This is an intervention."
Both of Slipstream's bodies speak, which at least makes it obvious to Arcee what the purple human next to me is. Arcee stares at her for a moment, then looks up at big Slipstream, then down to me. "Ah…"
No, that's Slipstream's job. Unless you have a jetpack tucked away somewhere.Jack looks at me. "Were you listening?"
I nod. "Of course we were. You obviously need a wingman."
Ah, finally, she twigs that something isn't being said to her.He cringes. "Can I take Tailgate instead? He seems cool."
Arcee raises her hands. "Okay, stop. I think I'm missing something important, and-" Her eyes fix on me. "-you're going to explain what it is or I'm going to start getting angry."
Well, that's good to hear, for his sake. Unfortunately, she's still missing the critical bit of intel..."Short version?" Jack cringes harder as I smile. "Jack wants the same sort of relationship with you that I have with Slipstream."
"Okay, what's strange about that? I've been thinking about requesting assignment back to Earth anyway." Jack's face brightens up. "That was why I brought Tailgate."
I'm impressed her vocoder could put that much sarcasm into that line without shorting out."Continuing the short version, humans and transformers form different sorts of social bonds due to differences in our physiology. Transformers naturally form task-adapted teams."
Arcee nods. "I do know how transformers socialise. You may not have noticed, but I am one."
Oh god, how wrong did she get it? I mean, The Talk, as filtered through a flighty Japanese girl's interpretation..."Humans form clusters based on… Ah… Manufacturing new humans. Jack was raised by his mother. The term 'mother' means-."
"She fabricated him inside her body." I raise my eyebrows. "Miko explained it. I didn't reallyohh."
I don't know, with a few adjustments... The scale might be tricky, but your altmode is about the right size...She looks down at Jack, who -and I'm mildly impressed by this- meets her eyes.
"Jack, I can't do that."
something that both species have in common, despite their differences."That isn't-. I know, but that's… That's how I feel about you."
I nod. "The human brain is not a rational thing."
I'll bet she is. Humans do have some clever ideas sometimes...Slipstream nods. "Neither's ours. But in the same way as your brain module thinks he makes a good team mate despite the fact that he's a tiny alien, his thinks that you'll make a good mother for his children despite needing an adaptor-" Her avatar poses suggestively, a motion almost certainly lost on Arcee. "-to be compatible. I'd say 'go for it', but I'm pretty biased."
Given it would probably be a fairly minor modification to a Cybertronian processor, That's saying something."And that's… Different to a normal team mate."
I nod. "Different to a normal conjunx endura, too." Her eyebrows raise. "Why did you think I got all these implants?"
Yay, he finally found his guts. Heart's probably pounding in his throat, but congratulations.Some of the tension leaves Arcee's frame, her eyes not really focusing on anything. "I… I don't know what that's… Like."
I glare at Jack and start frantically pointing at Arcee. And it takes him a moment, but then he girds his loins and walks over to her, resting his right hand on her left leg.
Hey, give him a little break, he's only, what, seventeen? How many guys would have that much emotional courage at that age?"Maybe we could… Like… Find out together?"
…
I give him six out of ten.
In Slipstream's rear cockpit seat, I roll my eyes.
Then what would you give a 4? This isn't a 4 point scale it is a 10 point scale in which 6 means passing, but not impressive.
Well if we are grading on a curve and giving handycaps.Come on, for his age and the situation that's a minimum 7/10. I would say 8/10, but he did need a little nudge there at the end.
Anyway, I think this whole situation has been gut-bustingly hilarious but still pretty wholesome. Good for you if it works out, Jack.
Thank you, corrected.
Glory is earned through adversity. Dance, sing- even when the bombs drop.
When has that ever stopped Bollywood before?
Considering it's Aligned/Prime continuity...Well glad to see that the air has been cleared between Jack and Tailgate. Paul is right, that is how things should be handled. "Polite, direct, leaving no room for misunderstanding. Not letting things fester." How Jack and Arcee handle things will be interesting and Slipstream is having way too much fun with this situation. Also a Six out of Ten? Really? I think considering how things could have gone, and the fact that Jack was able to look Arcee in the eyes means he deserves a higher score.
Also what does Tailgate look like? At least your version of him?
"the rest"
Hopefully Swamp Thing will have a defense for this in the future. Though now that we've ruled out the Dominators for what happened to that guy earlier in this episode, the new question is who was behind that. The Kroloteans perhaps?"I will remain near the World-Of-Father while I complete my daughter. Perhaps longer. Memory logs suggest that there are many interesting creatures here."
Biotechnologist makes an affirmative gesture. "That is certainly true! We had planned future expeditions here."
"Wait, future-?" I frown. "You mean to tell me that you haven't been collecting metahuman DNA?"
"No? None of us have the required specialisation. This work took all of our time. Your species is worth studying, but we have limits."
Great. So either they don't know about it, or it's someone else.
"Swamp Thing? Are you..? Ah. Willing to-?"
"I have little interest in acting as a father to her. But she touches the Green, and that is my domain. I will watch her."
Or maybe the Reach.Hopefully Swamp Thing will have a defense for this in the future. Though now that we've ruled out the Dominators for what happened to that guy earlier in this episode, the new question is who was behind that. The Kroloteans perhaps?
Thank you, corrected.