With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

[Mr Zoat]

20th August 2013
14:43 GMT -7

I look up as the heavy transportation shuttles of the Knights of Passage breach the cloud layer. They made pretty good time, all things considered. Living in the time of the most rapid technological development which Earth has ever undergone has rather given me an unrepresentative view of how technological progress usually works; fact is, unless you're coluan or human, change is slow and incremental. Those shuttles probably aren't all that different to the ones they used when the war was ongoing.

I smile up at them, and wave in a friendly way. I've also replaced my armour with something a little less obviously Apokoliptian. As far as I remember, Other Grayven never had anything to do with the Knights, but they'll definitely remember Apokolips. It would be difficult to cover up what I am -if they thought to look- but I'm reasonably confident that I can talk my way out of it if they actually listen to me.

Hiding isn't really an option if we're going to settle this planet, and this is a war grave. I have the utmost respect for anyone prepared to fight the most powerful New God my species has ever produced.

Perhaps a commemorative park..? My education never covered that aspect of their culture. Sinestro?

Our Source Wall was vastly different to yours, and the Knights do not exist. I have no useful data.

There are a series of quiet hisses as the shuttle's marines deploy using short-ranged teleporters. They're not pointing their weapons at me, though ring-translation of their expressions makes it clear that they're distinctly unhappy.

Their… Ah… Field Unifier steps forwards. "Who are you, stranger?"

"My name is Grayven. I'm assessing this world on behalf of a species looking for somewhere to colonise."

"Then I would recommend looking for somewhere else." He makes a negative gesture with his head fronds. "This world is a place of ill-omen. Strange and inexplicable events transpire here."

I nod. "I noticed. Does someone own it?"

"Some pilgrims like to come here to contemplate their own moral failures."

"Does it help?"

"The survivors usually think so. I don't recognise your species."

"Ah, well, no. You wouldn't. We don't do pilgrimages. If we want to visit the Source Wall, our transportation technology lets us skip the intervening distance."

"What is the name of your species? Your homeworld?"

"We actually claim two homeworlds. New Genesis is the nicer-."

Their body language switches to alert immediately, and every gun from the squad is levelled at me. A few seconds later the point defences of the shuttle follow suit.

"Apokoliptian."

"Look." I raise my hands. "I'm a defector. I left Apokolips centuries ago, because it's a horrible place. I have the greatest respect for your organisation-."

"Did you know that the tomb was here?"

"No. Didn't even know what wrecked the ecosystem. I mean, once I saw it I recognised what it was, and I disarmed Yuga Khan's traps-"

The Field Unifier lowers his weapons. I don't think it's a deliberate gesture, it looks like he's just so relieved that he doesn't think I'm a threat any longer.

"-and it turned out that one of your people was still alive in there. I performed some first aid, but I didn't want to move him in case-."

"Medic!"

I smile politely as the squad's medic hurried over. Obviously, moving the man wouldn't actually be a problem, but it sounds good and makes it clear that I'm not holding him hostage. "Just a moment. Persuader, could you open a portal, please?"

A slash in the air appears next to us, and I point to it.

"Just through there. My assistants will direct you."

The Field Unifier gestures to a couple of marines, and they go through first. A moment passes and one comes back to beckon the medic.

I give it a few moments after they pass through before returning my full attention to the Field Unifier. "So… Is there a problem with us colonising this planet? I realise that Yuga Khan made a point-."

He raises his right hand and makes a warding gesture. "Do not mention the Hell King's name to us."

"Okay. Ah. I realise that he did something here, and dumped a load of your ships on the surface to get buried… I understand if you have an objection."

"No. We would have restored this world ourselves as we have all of the others he devastated. Did you encounter any strange… Things?"

"Yes, but don't worry. That was all… His fault, and it shouldn't happen any more. Ah. But if you're worried, I can ask Highfather Izaya to check my work? Honestly, given who is responsible I'd probably ask him to anyway…"

"I thank you. And I do not think that it will be a problem. A decision will be made well above my level, and I am sure that we will recover the remains of our dead, but… There are none amongst the living with a conflicting claim to it."

Ah. Not surprising, but… Sombering.

"Well, I've got more work to do with soil samples and surveying. My people won't build anything permanent until I hear back from your organisation."

"Why do you want this world?"

"Whatever You Know Who did, it left the planet thaumically active. The species I'm working with use magic. Thaumically active worlds are hard to come by. We couldn't turn our noses up at this, even if it's a bit of a fixer upper."

"I… See. Will there be other Apokoliptians living here?"

"Ah, well, my brother and his wife are also defectors. They might want to visit, but they're happy on the planet they're currently living on."

"You don't intend to make it a refuge."

"Oh, sorry. No. For humans, maybe, depending on how things go, but I'm sorry to say that most Apokoliptians have… Adapted, to Darkseid. Himon does his best, but the vast majority regard that lamentable state of affairs as normal."

"It's a little strange to be talking to someone who lived there. For most of us, it's just-."

The marines leave the cut, the Spectre's former host between them on a stretcher. The medic follows shortly behind them, carrying the infuser system. "He should be physically fine, sir. But I'd like to evacuate-."

The Unifier makes a gesture of agreement. "Go."

The three of them hurry onto the shuttle, which lifts off at once and heads back towards the flotilla in orbit.

"What of the others?"

I raise my eyebrows. "Others?"

"Our records say that he took hundreds of prisoners."

"Ah. Well, I haven't checked the whole place, but the handful in the focal room were reduced to skeletons. I don't know what he did to them before, but I doubt that it was pleasant."

"Is it-? I would like to pray there, if that is possible. Their faith has always been an inspiration to me."

"Ah, sure. Just don't touch anything other than the floor. I don't think it's dangerous, but it's better to be certain."

He makes a gesture of compliance, and walks towards the portal.

Right, good impression made with the neighbours, planet made safe. Just have to have a quick chat with Izaya, and then I can go and give Hinon a piece of my FUCKING mind.

 

[Mr Zoat]

10th December 2022
16:39 GMT

We all look down upon Hell.

"Hm." Taggart picks up a stone and tosses it, trying to keep his eyes on it as it plummets into the hellscape below. "'s pretty big. Is that a bad sign?"

Endymion regards him curiously. "If they can't send demons to Earth then I doubt that it matters how big their army is."

"No, I mean… If that's where the souls of bad people go, then… Does it get bigger the more bad people there are?"

Endymion turns back to the hellscape, thinking it over. "Oh."

"If it makes you feel better, I'm not convinced that they're actually demons."

Taggart frowns, looking mildly offended. "Then what the fuck were they?"

"Some sort of living creature that naturally used Hell magic."

"What's the difference?"

I half-turn, pointing to the giant cybercorpse with the skull-shaped hole through its chest. "See how it's left a physical body, and bled actual blood?"

"And… What, proper demons don't do that?"

"Bingo. If they possess someone, it turns back into normal blood once they get banished. If they manifest, it… Basically evaporates. You can keep it corporeal with the right equipment or magic, but otherwise it decays back into raw magic without something anchoring it in place."

"We're in Hell. Where are they gunna go?"

"Even in Hell, they should decay into raw energy if they get smashed up enough. And… That thing's got internal organs."

Taggart nods thoughtfully. "Something that huge has got huge guts. I'd hate t' be the guy who's gotta unclog its toilet."

I shake my head. "I've been monitoring the surface of Hell. Plenty more demons of the types we've seen… And there's some sort of miniature 'New One', and a grey flying ball like the red flying balls, but I haven't seen any kind of animal or living plant."

"So..?"

"So I'm not sure they eat. I mean, it was walking around naked. Did you see an anus or urethra?"

"Is this the kinda thing officers talk about?"

"Thinking of going mustang?"

"I was just thinking… Once you all go back to super-Earth, I'm gunna be the leading expert on demons. Forget a Court Martial; I could turn that into an all expenses paid trip to Quantico."

"Is there a military prison in Quantico?"

"No, it's the Marine Corps O.C.S.."

"Right, it's just… Who in the government was backing the space program and the teleporter research, and how much are they going to want to cover this up?"

"Oh. Huh." He thinks for a moment. "Can we take the big guy back with us?"

"Don't see any reason why not. Why?"

"'cause… Yeah, I get what you mean, they could just black bag me. But I think it'd be the temporary kinda black bag, where I get a secure debrief away from the press. And…" He looks around. "Everyone responsible's gotta be dead by now. And the people in charge have gotta be smart enough to realise that this problem ain't goin' away."

"You're putting a lot of faith in the rationality of senior spooks and government officials, there."

He smiles. "That's why you're gunna drop me and the big guy off in Time Square."

"I see. Yes, that could work. Still a risk, though."

"What's your plan?"

I manifest an orange power ring, and hold it up.

He shakes his head. "Aw, Hell no."

"No?"

"That might be a thing you can do on Super Earth, but 'round here, if I had something like that, I'd go to sleep one day and wake up dead, and the ring would spent the rest of time in a DARPA lab being studied by 'top men'. My plan works 'cause I don't have anything except experience, but if I got something they actually want, it wouldn't work."

"You may have a point."

The air next to us glows, and then Sandro appears.

Taggart nods. "Hey man. You alright?"

"It was… Restful. But I am eager to return to my studies."

"Do you want us to drop you off somewhere? Not.. Ashan, presumably, but, somewhere else? Endymion could probably use a new magic adviser."

"Thank you, but I think that I should like to remain here."

Taggart blinks. "Ah…"

"On this moon, floating over Hell. I wish to study how it connects with other realms. Nothing about those creatures suggested great magical ability, and yet they were able to maintain portals to another plane of existence. I had assumed that was easier away from Ashan, but that easy? I think there's something about this place that makes it easier."

I nod. "Alright then." I hold out my right hand while Taggart fishes around in his combat webbing. "Since we probably won't see each other again."

Sandro takes it, shaking it bonily. "Travelling with you has been a fascinating experience."

"Here." Taggart passes him a radio. "Just in case I ever come back here and need to get in touch."

"A sensible measure. It wouldn't do for your colleagues to mistake me for one of the possessed."

I look up at the sound of flapping, and Mazikeen and Angelica come in to land, my alter ego floating along with them.

"Learn anything?"

Angelica nods. "That I sorely underestimated Zor, and shall not do so again. The magic these creatures use is crude but powerful, and requires the strongest of their number to sustain it for ritualistic reasons."

Mazikeen shrugs. "We can take us home, but we're no closer to finding out why we went where we went. And frankly, I don't care enough to want to delay our return."

"And, ah…" I point to the skull which is now flying around Taggart. "Him?"

Mazikeen shakes her head. "We can't turn him back. I'm not sure how much of him was still there when you did… What you did. I suspect that it was more an instinct than an intelligent decision. Perhaps he will recover and perhaps he won't."

I nod sadly. "Alright. I suppose that's the best we can do. Everyone ready?"

Everyone nods, and I press the detonator, and a thousand blinding lights erupt across the surface of Hell.

 

[Mr Zoat]

20th August 2013
17:02 GMT -7

Hinon nods to herself. "Oh, that's where he went."

Ayeadjujguh-!

"'Oh, that's where he-'." I make an 'exploding head' gesticulation with both arms. "Hinon, it was the Spectre!"

She looks at me like I'm being a little dense. "Yes, you did explain that at some length. I said that I didn't have much information on the planet, and that was why I hesitated to recommend it."

"My grandfather built a monument to his victory out of destroyed ships and their surviving crews!"

"Grayven, do you have any concept of how many places Yuga Khan built things like that?"

That brings me up short. It's not like Father liked talking about Grandfather, and most of the senior New Gods of his generation weren't really involved with him prior to his enwallment. I… Actually don't know how common it was, either from my own memories or Other Grayven's.

"Nno? How many?"

This time she actually sighs. "Grayven, I was in a coma for millions of years. I didn't even know that your grandfather existed until recently."

I frown. "I know… Scale can be an issue, but wasn't Apokolips in general worth a briefing? Given our relationship and the Anti-Life?"

"Those two things are the only reason why I know at all. Grayven, do you understand how large a galaxy is? And how long a million years is?"

"Yuga Khan was the most powerful being in the material universe."

"Was. I didn't look into him in any detail because as we both know, once a menace to civilisation ends up upon the Source Wall, they're no longer an active element in galactic civilisation, no matter how powerful they were before."

"The recording said otherwise."

"Yes, and while that was an uncharacteristically modest statement on the part of Yuga Khan, I'm not prepared to accept it as literal truth." But at least she's thinking about it. "Do you know of any other beings like the Spectre?"

"Jesus Christ."

She gives me an odd look, then nods. "Ah, you're being literal."

"Not that I expect you to have good records on him-"

"Good, because I don't."

"-but there aren't many things with that sort of link to the Source that aren't New Gods, and if Grandfather could use a New God then there'd be hundreds of escape routes." I smile faintly. "And Father would have spent more time working out how to disarm them."

"Do you intend to tell him?"

"Go to Apokolips voluntarily? Heck no."

"It may be worth doing. If I recall the briefing correctly, his own father is the only thing that Darkseid fears. He may actually feel grateful."

"Yes. Getting another piece of the Anti-Life Equation injected into my soul is exactly what I need."

"Yes? You have friends, now. If I understood your explanation of Equestrian magic correctly, that's all you need."

"All I need if I want Father to start actively investigating something that apparently deletes the Anti-Life at will. Once he could accept. More than that and he's going to start trying to work out how to Anti-Life all of Wilson. Or just destroy it with a fleet."

"Hm. Alright. So if we can return to the purpose of this exercise, will you be using the planet?"

"Probably. The Knights of Passage are passing messages around their command, but initial signs are positive."

"What about the rest of the device?"

"Yeah, I'm calling Izaya in on that one. If he wants someone else to look at it, that's his-." No. Wait. "I'm calling Scott in on that one, given that escapology is his thing. And if he can't help, I'll-" I smile. "-get in touch with Orion and see what he thinks."

"I doubt that will improve your relationship with your brother, but I suppose that's your problem."

"Winding each other up is a very brotherly thing to do."

"Doesn't he want to kill you?"

"It's more of a ground state of being than a desire. Do you want to look at Yuga Khan's setup?"

"What part of me knowing nothing about Yuga Khan makes you think that I want to look at his defanged escape mechanism?"

"Because you've identified a hole in your knowledge and naturally want to correct the failure of your education?"

"Grayven, I'm overseeing the Orange Lantern Corps' war with the Reach. My powers are immense, but my throughput is limited. And if there's nothing else, I'd like to get back to my actual job."

"Yep, we're done. See you next time one of us needs something from the other. Mother Box."

BOOM!

"Must you?"

I smirk as I step through the boom tube, activating my aero-discs as I emerge in space near to the Knights of Passage base nearest… My new planet that needs a new name. Acquire census data and scan for discrepancies.

None found.

Hm.

BOOM!

The krendek homeworld. They'll pick me up in a minute or two, but that shouldn't matter. Acquire census data and scan for discrepancies.

Subject found.

Down we go, then.

The Spectre's new mortal krendek body glowers at me. "You."

"You have no grounds for complaint. I disarmed Yuga Khan's trap, saved your host and saved you, actually. And I'm not even going to kill you here, which is going to create extra work and risk for me and grant me absolutely no benefits. But hey, you got your own body and a way back into the Silver City."

"I will rejoin the Knights of Passage. I will fight evil and earn my place. Apokolips will burn."

"That's redundant. Apokolips has fire pits; it's always on fire. But- and I don't expect you to listen, but I thought that I'd try- do you think maybe it might be worth using this opportunity to learn the more peaceful virtues? You could. You don't have divinely appointed responsibilities any longer. And they didn't let you back in, no matter how many evildoers you horribly tortured to death."

He pulls his green rag cloak more tightly around him-. I fabricate some civilian clothes and deposit them next to him.

"Your words are the medium by which the poison in your soul escapes into the universe."

"Well, I tried. Mother Box, let's go home."

"Ping."

 

[Mr Zoat]

20th November 1995
18:52 GMT

The four of us walk back through the D-Point portal, and I doubt that I'm the only one breathing a quiet sigh of relief. Right up until I see all the zombies Sandro left behind, stranding in orderly ranks and awaiting an order from their master.

"Um. Should we..? Send them-?"

Angelica raises her hands and sends out a wave of golden fire, completely disintegrating them.

Or… That works. That's… Interesting, actually. The youma function more like organic creatures than demons back on Earth 16, in much the same way that the demons from Doom do. Except there are clearly male and female youma, whereas other than the grey floating ball things I didn't see any way for the Doom demons to reproduce.

"Endymion, can youma breed?"

He jerks his head in my direction, blinking. "Huh?"

"They clearly have male and female, but I suppose that could just be mirroring humans for magic reasons?"

"I hadn't really thought about it." He looks around and Mazikeen and Angelica examine the portal. "Ah, what day is it?"

"Monday."

"What..? Month?"

"It's the twentieth of November, but I imagine that given everything that's happened your… Ah. Employer?"

"I was thinking about my parents. But I'll have to work out what to tell my professors and the Dean, too."

"I suggest an edited version of the truth. You were kidnapped by the evil monster and only just got back."

He looks at the floor, sighing. "Are secret identities common on your Earth?"

"Oh gosh yes."

"How do you make them work?"

"I never bothered. Honestly, half the time I think there's a blank spot in peoples' brains that makes them turn off their facility for facial recognition when they see skin tight Lycra."

"No, not-. How you split your time, between hero stuff and… School, and work?"

I shake my head. "Again, I went full time from the start. And…" I turn and nod at Mazikeen and Angelica. "I don't think they can help you either. Can you sense youma?"

"Only-." He blinks. "Wait. I-. Ah, Endymion, knew a spell… For that. And now I know it."

"With Beryl neutered and Metalia dead, are there any major evildoers left on Earth? Political commentary aside."

"No, there aren't. So you're saying I should just focus on school and only fight the youma right in front of me?"

"I think you should take advantage of this period of comparative normalcy to focus on your personal development. In your place I'd be looking for something that I could easily monetise, but I can be a bit mercenary about stuff like that."

"I don't think the royal treasury survived… However long it's been."

"No, but America's almost certainly going to be throwing billions into magic research. You could probably write your own ticket. If that's what you wanted to do."

"Huh." He nods slowly. "Teaching the people of Earth how to protect themselves is… Something that Endymion would approve of. And it would solve my problem about having a double life. But I should probably talk it over with Princess Serenity-. Ah, Sailor Moon first."

"Going for the reassociation?"

"I don't understand."

"Oh, sorry… Do you know Star Trek?"

He nods. "Yeah, one of the guys in my dorm is a big fan."

"There's a species in it called trill, and some of them have a symbiote in their bodies that keeps a backup copy of their memories. When they're dead or dying, it gets taken out and implanted into someone new, who then gets access to the memories of all previous hosts."

"It's a little like being reincarnated."

"Yep. But there's a strong social stigma against having relationships with the hosts of symbiotes your symbiote's former hosts had relationships with. I don't remember exactly why, but if I had to guess it's because they don't regard each host as being the same person but… As a new person adding something new to the symbiote's memories. Repeating what their past self did implies that the memories are-."

"Wait. Are you saying you think the only reason I'm interested in Sailor Moon is because Endymion was in love with Princess Serenity?"

"Bluntly, yes. And the same for her, only since you got all his memories and.. I don't know exactly what she got, so it might be less intense. Or… More, because she doesn't have context, I don't know."

He thinks it over for a moment, clearly uncomfortable.

"I don't think you're right, but then I suppose I wouldn't. I… Haven't spent much time with her in our normal lives. And… I guess I should before making firm plans."

"Given that her group, the surviving Heavenly Kings and Beryl represent all of the known magic users on this Earth, you should probably all get together-."

Rose petals burst from nothing next to us as Zoisite appears. "Who-?"

He stares at Tuxedo Mask, who stares back.

"Ah, hey Zoisite. Or.. do you go by… Your.. current name?"

"You're alive. We all-. Thought you were…"

Tuxedo Mask nods. "I don't know if it was the Silver Crystal or Sandro's spell, but I woke up in the dungeons right before they-" He indicates the rest of us. "-left."

"Okay, glad-" Zoisite raises his hands in a 'stop' gesture. "-to have you back, but we've got a problem."

"What is it?"

"About half the American army is camped up on the surface and they've probably got seismographs, which means that they'll be sending a team down in a moment. Obviously we could fight our way through, but we've been keeping things quiet until everyone calms down."

Tuxedo Mask nods, and… Resummons his original evening dress costume. "Can you teleport with me?"

"Yes, but what about them?"

"We-" Mazikeen gestures at the portal, glowing runes burning into the stonework. "-will find our own way out."

I nod, walking back towards the portal as a pastoral scene appears on the far side. "Best of luck, both of you. Pass on my regards to me."

Zoisite looks the portal over, then dismisses us as I hear rapidly moving boots from the upper level. "Endymion, we need to go."

"Okay, let's-."

Zoisite grabs him in an awkward embrace and then they're gone in a shower of rose petals.

Glad that's resolved. I wonder how the other Sailors deal with memories of their past life relationships?

Mentally shrugging, I follow Mazikeen and Angelica through the portal-.

"Darn it, we've missed our reservation!"

 

[Mr Zoat]

HappyHappy

29th August 2013
22:29 GMT -5

Artemis glares at me in astonishment.

"Waitwaitwaitwait. Sailor Moon."

"Yes. I mean we.. didn't talk for long-."

"How did you not recognize her? You made me a Sailor Moon costume on Halloween!"

"I didn't actually meet her until the whole thing was almost over. I was mostly dealing with Sailor Venus."

"She looks basically the same!"

"But her name's different. And she was wearing a-." Oh gods it's finally happened. "A.. little… Mask-thing."

Artemis shakes her head, hands turned upwards in a 'so what?' gesture.

"Look, I recognised it as a sailor fuku type outfit, but since it wasn't exactly the same as Sailor Moon's costume I thought it was just… You know, drawing inspiration from the same source. I don't assume that everyone in a skin tight costume with a cape is Superman."

"She was Sailor Moon!"

"I never watched it! And it was Sailor Venus! Except she introduced herself as 'Sailor V' so I never made the connection!"

Artemis closes her eyes and rubs her forehead with her right hand.

"And I.. thought she meant the French phrase, rather than…"

She snort-laughs, shaking her head. "Did you tell Jade yet?"

"Yeah, she had no idea who Sailor Moon was."

"Really?" She frowns, her eyes growing distant. "Oh yeah, I guess I only started watching it after she.. left. Huh."

"Do you want to get everyone together for a Sailor Moon marathon?"

"Doesn't Bir Tawil have a sex-ratio more extreme than Themyscira right now?"

"No, though it does have fewer men in total. It's the per capita you've got to watch out for."

Though with 'taking the Medina approach' becoming more common-. Not common-common, but she's far from the only one, Themyscira has actually had a few male births. The rest of the new mothers have just been upfront about their intentions from the start. Except Daphne, who is actually marrying the child's father, and that's a forum bunfight I am staying the heck away from.

"'cause you've got those two Orange Lantern girls-."

"Women."

"Mother and daughter, huh?"

"There were perfectly good reasons for recruiting them unrelated to my libido."

"And Supergirl and Bleez."

"And Jade."

"So are there, like, pillow fights..?"

This time I close my eyes. "To the best of my knowledge there has only been one. I walked in on the closing stages and immediately turned around and left. Lantern Coutara also did not participate."

"And Jade did?"

"I think so? I respected that it was female-specific bonding activity and kept my nose out."

"Is that your excuse for not recognising Sailor Moon?"

Alright, if you want to be like that… "On the next world I visited we met a man named Flynn Taggart. Naturally, I was thrilled."

I stare at her, and raise my eyebrows.

"What?" She shrugs. "I don't know who that is."

"Main character of Doom."

She thinks about it for about two seconds. "Yeah, I don't know what that is either. And I never even made someone a costume of it."

There's a yellow blur, and then Wallace is next to us. "Who's making a costume?"

"Doom."

He looks puzzled. "Doom's making a costume?"

"No, Doom, the game where you kill demons."

"Oh." He sits down next to us. "Yeah, I guess it would be kinda difficult. The soldiers just look like generic soldiers and the demons would need a full body suit. So… What d' they look like in three-d?"

I generate a palm-sized construct imp, then a pinkie, then rotate through the rest.

Artemis frowns. "That's not actual size, right?"

I roll my eyes, and add a construct of myself for scale.

She doesn't look impressed. "Can they do magic?"

"They basically just throw fireballs."

"So… What happened after the five seconds it would take you to nuke them all?"

"Oh, they did a ritual that turned my rings off. I had to fight them using a shotgun."

Wallace blinks. "Do you even-? Oh right, you go to that gun range."

"I stopped going a while ago, but yes, I do know how to use a shotgun."

"So was it like the game..?"

"The demons could climb and the Cyberdemon talked, but otherwise-" I nod. "-pretty much. Oh, Artemis wants to know if you're up for a Sailor Moon marathon."

He looks awkwardly at Artemis. "Ah…"

"You don't have to."

"Well… You say that… But-."

"You don't have to!"

He looks at me, trying to gain information from my facial expression.

"Hey, I've got to do it as a penalty for ending up in the Sailor Moon universe and not noticing. You don't-."

"I'll-. Okay, I'll do it. Always good to broaden your horizons, right?"

Artemis looks away, rolling her eyes and shaking her head. Wallace-.

"Oh, hey." He looks down over the edge of the roof towards the suspected drug distribution centre we're staking out. "Looks like they're on the move."

 

[Mr Zoat]

29th August 2013
22:29 GMT -5

I jerk back in the air to avoid a thrown… Tire iron? And get back to trying to purge whatever exotic narcotic this is from… Timothy Symons. I don't know if he overdosed or it's just this deadly, but it's trying to do nasty things to his central nervous system.

"So how's college..? Stuff going?"

A henchman tries bringing an automatic rifle to bear on Artemis, only for Wallace to speed across the… Building site, and send him flying with a narrowly subsonic right hook.

"Ah, it's not. We only had-"

He flickers to the side as the drugged-up OMAC serving as the gang's muscle calls in a shot from orbit, narrowly missing him.

"-four months before-"

Artemis finally stuns the last of the drug-maddened unfortunates who tried to dogpile her without realising that she was super tough, and recovers her bow.

"-the Anti-Life happened."

It's fascinating; I think I've got the last of it out of his body and it just… Reappears. Which suggests… Either that it's dimensionally exotic, or it's magically forming a conceptual link-. Which I wouldn't be able to detect, because power rings struggle directly detecting magic and the spell wouldn't have to be on the subject…

"How are they handling-"

Wallace dashes past the OMAC, who swings at him and misses. Wallace doesn't try to hit him, but instead tosses something at his face.

"-that?"

Artemis sights, notches, draws and looses, and the chap who is trying to do something on the computer finds an arrow sticking in the screen right in front of his face.

"Ah, it varies. The younger kids are just going back to class. For everyone else, it kinda depends on how badly the local infrastructure got messed up."

There should be something… Ah, yes! A little twinkle we can feed on. And just like that, he doesn't get dosed again. Give it a moment just in case…

"I meant, for you."

"I just got a couple of extra essays and I can just carry on like it never happened. Kid's gotta redo the year."

"Really? Oh, and I fixed this guy."

The OMAC is down on one knee, but clearly trying to get back up. Wallace looks at him in concern. "Huh. That was a big dose of tranquiliser."

"Aren't OMACs immune to mind-altering chemicals?"

"Yeah, but not magic. Turns out that sending people to sleep with alchemy is pretty easy." The OMAC swipes at him, and he sidesteps. "Unless they're OMACs, I guess."

I gently put my test subject Mr. Symons down and close in on the OMAC. Reach out… Got it.

The OMAC's eyes widen slightly, his face relaxing. And then he lets Wallace's tranquiliser have its intended effect, and collapses to the ground.

Wallace smiles. "Alright. Let me just-" He blurs away and then reappears, I.T. technician dragged back with one hand and the computer hard disk in the other. "-grab some stuff."

The technician stares around in surprise, then does the hot-foot dance as he realises that the friction set his shoes on fire.

"You really have to repeat the whole year?"

"Yeah, our professor didn't make it, and most of the class didn't come back after…"

"Did they die?"

"No-. I mean, not.. all of them. But it's like… With how the economy's going, it's not all that obvious how a Chemistry degree's gunna turn into a job."

Which is… Fair enough, I suppose. I nod sympathetically as I recover and zip tie the fallen before ensuring that I've purged their systems.

"Plus, a lot of families can't afford to pay tuition any more…" He shrugs. "Courses are getting cut. Mine's still gunna run, but with all of…" He nods at me and Artemis. "This, I couldn't fit the first year in the first year. And…"

Artemis raises an eyebrow as she calls the local police. "And?"

"A-hhhhh…" Wallace sighs. "I don't know if it's worth it."

She frowns. "Huh?"

Ah…

"They're not wrong about the job market. And I was.. kinda thinking about making alchemy a full time thing, and the F.D.A.'s basically shut down at the moment…"

"They're not gunna be shut down forever, Kid."

"I… Figure if I can get Doctor Mist to sign off on something being useful and effective, I can go over their heads."

Artemis hesitates for a moment, before turning to me. "Is..? That how it works right now?"

"Effectively, yes. The Justice League has a lot of leeway in handling the current crisis. If Kid Flash can create a potion that -for example- rapidly regenerates wounds and can't easily be weaponised, it's perfectly possible to bypass the normal regulatory steps."

"Actually, I've been working on a bio-regulator potion. A couple of the guys in my class have diabetes. Insulin prices in the U.S. have been kinda crazy for a while, so I figured it would be a good place to start, then..."

I nod, painfully aware of how many people with chronic conditions died even after we purged the Earth of Anti-Life. My sister used to work for… And maybe still does work for, an international pharmaceuticals company, so I had some idea of how many countries medicines get shipped around between before being sold to the end user even before coming here. And that could be a problem in war zones, but… This whole planet has become a war zone several times. We're making an effort to rebuild in such a way that essentials don't need to get shipped further than they absolutely have to -and to be fair that's something that most governments were working on before the Anti-Life happened- but it's… Not easy, rearranging things like that.

"If Doctor Mist signs off on the efficaciousness, I can ship it. I can probably arrange for shipping reagents in bulk, too."

"Thanks, but what about when you're not on Earth?"

"No, I meant that Cadbury Shipping can handle it. We're basically magical Amazon these days."

"Okay, ah… Can we talk about this after we hand these guys over?"

"Sure." I nod. "Though a man you've probably never met called Oliver Queen is my proxy, and he knows more about the company than I do."

"I… May have heard of him." He looks away at the sound of police sirens. "Meet up and talk about it later?"

"Yes. Ah. And in relation to this case, I'll put it my report, but I think the drugs were using some sort of conceptual link. I'm not sure why or how or whether it needed someone to deliberately activate it, but there was definitely an ongoing magic effect even after I removed the drug."

Artemis nod. "Do you think Batman will let us interrogate the OMAC, or-"

The air around the OMAC glows, and two more OMACs appear. We get a polite nod, and then they bind their compatriot before teleporting away again.

"-will that happen?"

 

[Mr Zoat]

29th August 2013
23:43 GMT -5

Wallace looks at me sceptically as I power on the fryer. "Are you sure this is legal?"

Artemis give him a mild glare. "Says the guy talking about dodging the F.D.A.."

"Magic medicine's gunna save lives and they don't really have anyone who can risk assess it anyway. This could actually get the cops called on us."

I load the fries into the fryer basket, and put the burgers on the hot plate. The fries I took out of stock, but the burgers came from subspace. It's not that America can't raise good beef… It's that they choose not to. "Their license doesn't allow them to open this late to sell food. It doesn't stop them -for example- cleaning the place up after the cut off time. And it doesn't stop them renting it out to someone to use it as a private kitchen, as they have to us."

And in the fries go.

"Does anyone actually want salad?"

Artemis shakes her head. "They buy it at the start of the day and it's nearly midnight so no?"

Wallace looks like he's about to agree, then something occurs to him. "Can you, like, re-crisp it?"

"I'm insulted that both of you think that I'm going to use any produce from here. Honestly? I'm only using the fries because I could remove the pesticide residue by power ring."

Wallace winces. "Come on, dude. Don't ruin fast food for me."

"Food and Drug Administration. Know your enemy."

Artemis looks… Mildly amused? "So, what, the lettuce comes from some tiny farm in France-"

"Italy, actually."

"-where you-. Is that where you used to get food for the base from?"

"It's one of a number of places I source high quality food from."

Flip the burgers, add the buns to the hotplate…

"I actually did a worldwide survey of everything we regularly eat, to find the best place to buy it."

"So are you having salad?"

"No. Lettuce is still lettuce."

Wallace considers. "So what have you got?"

"Just about everything. Though if you want fried onion you've-" I lift the fryer basket out of the fat and hook it up to drain. "-taken too long."

"You know what? Let's do this. Lettuce, onion, tomato and… What cheese you got?"

"Yes, Kid Flash. I even have the exploding maggot cheese, though if I take it out of subspace I have to arrest all of us."

"Isn't American cheese supposed to be perfect for burgers?"

"If you only care about the appearance of something that's covered by a bun, certainly. If you care about flavour, no. If you're asking for my recommendation, I suggest a small quantity of a strong cheese. Stilton, perhaps."

"What are you having?"

"I'm not, I don't like cheese-." Huh. "Did I ever tell you about what my mother did on my-. Fifteenth birthday?"

"Ah… No?"

"It had been know in my family since I was very young that I disliked cheese. My parents thought that my tastes would change as I got older, and I bet that they wouldn't. Five pounds was the prize-."

I remove the buns from the hotplate.

"So do you actually want salad?"

"I'll… Stick with lettuce, onion and tomayto. Artey?"

I take a lettuce out of subspace, slice through it with x-ionised knives and begin assembling.

"Same, I guess?"

I nod. "Tim?"

"Huh?" The youth whose brain I healed lifts his head up from the table. "What?"

Slice tomato above and below… "Do you want salad in your burger?"

"Oh. Ah, yeah, please."

Bun, lettuce, tomato, burger, tomato, lettuce, bun-.

Artemis is watching me do preparation. "What happened to the mayo?"

I shudder theatrically, then deposit mayonnaise and ketchup bottles onto the counter. Oh, and a salt grinder.

Bun, lettuce, tomato, onion, burger, onion, tomato, lettuce, bun, bun, lettuce, tomato, onion, burger, onion, tomato, lettuce, bun, bun, lettuce, tomato, onion, burger, onion, tomato, lettuce, bun, bun, onion, burger, onion, bun. Fries into the little cardboard boxes… And transition to the counter, placing everyone's meals in front of them.

Wallace takes hold of the salt grinder. "Seriously, dude?"

I take hold of it in an orange aura, spin it at high speed so that the salt falls into a construct hopper, transmute the grinder into a shaker, reintroduce the salt and then close the lid. "Happy?"

"Actually? Yes."

Artemis mayonnaises, then passes the bottle down the line. Tim does the same with the ketchup, Wallace passes the salt…

I take a bite of my burger. Naturally, it's perfect.

"Cheesecake was a not uncommon pudding in our household, but it was made out of this weird packet mix. I still don't know what exactly it was made of."

Artemis gestures with her burger. "Given how obsessive you are about food? Maybe you shouldn't look it up."

"I have looked it up on three separate occasions and had Miss Martian erase my memory of the results each time."

"Really?"

"No." She snorts with amusement. "So the day before my fifteenth birthday, the day when the bet would be won, for the first time in either of our lives, my mother made a cheesecake with actual cheese. I ate it. I liked it. And the five pounds was lost. Oh, she said that she'd forgotten all about the bet." I shake my head as I pick up a handful of-. Thank you Wallace, salted fries. "But I knew better. I knew better."

"Yeah, surprise cheesecake." Artemis nods, eyebrows raised. "My mom never did anything that sneaky."

Wallace takes a bit, chews, then-.

"Mmmm. Mss ms muh mnuhuh mrrmuh."

"I'm glad you think so. Tim, how the heck did an OMAC get shot up with superdrugs?"

 

[Mr Zoat]

29th August 2013
23:48 GMT -5

Tim prods listlessly at his ketchup blob with a fry. "He-. It's not-." He sighs, not meeting our eyes. "It's not.. an injection. It's a patch; you just stick it on. And… When I.. spoke to him? He said he just… Wanted to.. feel things."

"Feel things like..?"

"Well… Ah… It makes you feel an… Emotion."

"I scanned your brain pretty thoroughly; you should be able to feel emotion normally."

He nods morosely. "Yeah. I can."

O-h.

"I.. get it. Anti-Life sucked for everyone. I'm not.. special. Couple of my friends died, but-. Wasn't all of them. My dad made it. But…" He slumps a little. "Our neighborhood got wrecked. Family business? Gone. We're not exactly a priority for rebuilding, which… Sure, I get it. It's not like we're an essential industry or anything. My great-granddad didn't get help when he started it… And that's… Fine, I can put the work in. But the dollar ain't worth shit any more. I had-. Other stuff I wanted to do, and that's… Not happening now. And like I said, I'm not special. I'm not expecting anyone to fly in and fix it for me. But… It was… Hard. And my friends, the ones who survived? They're all…"

He makes a vague 'over there' gesture.

"They've moved, they're working the same hours I am… They're trying to stick their lives back together. Lee isn't going to college, Brae had to move out of state… We don't… See each other-. Hell, for a while we couldn't even call each other. And… The white light we all saw… I felt… Alive, like I didn't have to worry about the Anti-Life… And that was great, except… When it was over… I can't get that feeling back. It's like… I felt this amazing thing, and I know I'm never going to feel that way again."

He shakes his head.

"If it wasn't for the other stuff I probably wouldn't even care, but the other stuff is happening, and I… I do. I'm missing something I didn't even know existed and I only felt for about five seconds. And I'd.. rather feel like this than go back to the Anti-Life -fuck no- but I…"

Artemis nods sympathetically. "You just wanted something that felt good. Like… 'Normal'."

"Yeah." He nods. "I've never… I drink… You know, socially. Smoked cigarettes, gave it up 'cause I didn't like what it did to my sense of smell. Smoked a joint twice in my whole life. I know one guy who did coke ever. I don't want you to think I… Like I always need things like this."

I nod. "So how did you..? Get in touch with your supplier?"

He frowns weakly. "Is it even illegal?"

I shrug. "It's not a proscribed drug, specifically, but as we said, the F.D.A. isn't really functioning right now. The stuff you were taking isn't approved for sale or use. The people selling it to you were committing a crime, but you probably weren't."

"Probably?"

"It's magic."

"Is it? I just thought it was.. some kind of neurotransmitter thing…"

"I purged the mundane chemicals from your brain nine times. Each time they reappeared from nowhere."

"Oh."

"I mean, there is a neurotransmitter component, but that doesn't explain how it was doing what it did."

"I don't… I mean, I don't know anything about magic..?"

I shake my head. "No reason why you would. I'm not even sure exactly what it was doing, other than resisting my attempt to remove it."

"Is it..? Like a bad trip? One of those things that happens sometimes? Or was it more like a bad batch? Or were they..? Cutting it with something?"

"Frankly, I have no idea. If I had to guess, it's a novel piece of alchemy and they're still working the bugs out. What did it feel like to you?"

"It felt-." He shifts awkwardly. "Great, actually. I just-. I buy happy. A dose makes me feel happy for about a few hours… Half a day at most. Not… Laughing at everything like I'm drunk or high, just… Feels like I'm having a good time, whatever I'm doing. I'm still me, I still know what's happening, I can still feel other things, but it's… Nice, it takes the edge off whatever else is going on. What I got… That was more intense. Sort of like… What I figured heroin would be like. Everything was great. Everything was fine."

Wallace looks up from the remains of his burger. "Hey… Does that sound like.. Smilex to you?"

"Yes. It does."

"Wait, wait, Smilex?" Tim clenches in fear. "The stuff the Joker used on those killer vines to make people die laughing?"

Wallace nods. "Started out as an antidepressant. Side effect was, it doesn't turn off."

I point my burger at Artemis, and then actually try taking a bite before it getsuhhuuuh that's a good burger. Really makes me appreciate improving my sensory acuity.

And Artemis is on the ball. "Which is why we're worried about an OMAC getting it. We really don't need an OMAC Joker."

"Yeah-. Ah, no. Shit. I dunno. I saw him a couple of times talking to our… Our dealer. Honestly, it-. Made me think maybe it really was a drug trial or something. That's what the guy said it was; some new mood enhancer they got from a lab contact."

Artemis shrugs. "You said the OMAC said he wanted to feel things. Did he say what sort of things?"

"You don't really… You don't chat when you're… Lining up to buy drugs. Only… Thing I really know is… I just bought happy, right?" She nods. "He bought other stuff. The times I saw him, he always had something different. That was why I asked him; it seemed weird. I mean, why would an OMAC do something like that, right?"

"So just..? Feel anything..?"

"I dunno. Maybe he was mixing things at home?" He frowns. "What does..? Being an OMAC..? Actually..? Do to you? I figured it was just some kind of super-injection, but from what he said it sounded like he didn't really… Remember things from before?"

Artemis glances off to the side. "Yeah, Batman doesn't exactly boast about that part of it."

"Ah…" Tim looks to me for confirmation.

"Everyone who volunteers gets told about that, and gets the opportunity to talk to people who have been through it. But as you've observed, some people have had it worse than you."

"Huh."

"Hey, uh." Wallace looks curious. "What emotions did they sell, exactly?"

"Ah, happy, obviously. Angry. Scared. Hopeful. Calm-. I, er, tried that once." He shakes his head. "I didn't like it. You just don't react to stuff like an actual person. Ah, love-."

Artemis nods. "You try that one?"

"No." Tim shakes his head. "It sounded messed up. If you're not in love with someone, what exactly are you supposed to be feeling?

She nods.

"Excitement. I saw a couple of people who took that. That one was like coke, but I guess without messing up your nose? Beyond that, I don't really know. There wasn't a big selection when I started, and once I tried happy I wasn't interested in trying the others." He looks around at us. "So, what happens now?"

"We track the original supplier and review their work. Like I said, what they're doing is a concern because it might be unsafe, and from how the local distributor reacted to us it probably is. If they're really lucky, maybe the distributor was the problem and they can get legitimised."

"But I'm cut off."

"Yes… But... The… White light you felt? That wasn't a unique thing. Doctor Mist of the Justice League uses it full time. Has for millennia. Heck, even I got into the right headspace once, way before I became a superhero. It's difficult, but with enough arcane study there's no reason why you shouldn't be able to do the same."

Tim blinks. "Really?"

"Really. So don't despair. There's nothing a person can't accomplish with sufficient effort."

"How?"

"You.. could start with transcendental meditation…"

 

[Mr Zoat]

15th June 2012
15:26 GMT +2
Earth 8096

I take a small sip of hot chocolate, listening to the sliding back of chairs and movement of feet as the other patrons clear out in something of a hurry.

Latverians have a complicated relationship with their sovereign, but no matter how much better they think he is than the alternatives none of them want to be around when he's about to fight someone.

Someone wearing significantly heavier armour than the local citizenry marches around and takes up position opposite me, and in the corners of my eyes I see billowing green cloth and shining metal.

"Lantern."

I look up at his metal faceplate. "Y-. I'm sorry, do you prefer 'your majesty' or 'doctor'?"

And scan-. Yeah, that didn't work. But scan his environment because that mask isn't sealed…

Ah.

"The ego of Doom is not so fragile that it would make any difference. Why are you here, Orange Lantern?"

"Tourism. I-" I reach for my satchel. "-have a visa, if you want to check it?"

"Doom is aware of everything that happens in his kingdom. Doom is also aware than you have been attempting to arrange a meeting such as this for just under a year."

"I am grateful that you've found time for me, Doctor."

Even if I am getting a Doombot. You found a way to block my scans, the weight is roughly what I estimate yours is and it even breathes. What it doesn't do is use oxygen.

"'Tourism'." I nod. "Doom is exceedingly sceptical."

"I'd hope that by learning more about Latveria and its culture, I would learn something that would help me to become more persuasive in my missives to you. I doubted that I would see you in person, but… Here you are. I'm carrying no weapons other than the ring, which in deference to Latverian weapon control laws I'm not wearing. If you wish for me to leave, then I will of course do so at once."

He continues staring down at me.

I gesture towards the counter, where the woman manning it is standing to attention.

"Would you like a hot chocolate? It's really quite good. And so are the pastries; you would not believe how hard it is to get good food in America. Your farming and food adulteration policies should be the model for the world to follow."

Might be a bit… Impractical in some places, but definitely something to aim for.

"Doom studied in America for several years, as well you know. Doom is aware of the failings of American agriculture."

I nod, waiting politely.

"Since Doom is here, speak your piece. State your case."

"I feel that you have the capacity to be a tremendous benefit to humanity, and that your feud with Doctor Richards -not that I'm attempting to minimise the significance of what he did to you- is distracting you from making progress in that direction. So I was wondering if there was something that I could do that would help you in that regard."

He keeps staring. If it was really him, I'd assume that his heads-up display was showing him something. Since it's a Doombot, I assume that it's awaiting instructions. Doom himself might actually be using it to speak to me now.

"Doom does not require assistance, especially not from you."

"Clearly. But it might be helpful; speeding certain projects up, or encouraging people to listen to you who might otherwise be prejudiced against you." I take another sip of hot chocolate, in case he wants to say something. No? Alright. "I'm not Doctor Richards or Anthony Stark. I know that I'm nothing like as intelligent as you. But that doesn't mean that I'm useless."

I put my left hand on the part of my shirt covering the ring.

"May I?"

"Doom will permit this."

I reach in and put the ring on, the environmental shield activating at once. But I don't don my armour.

"I found this in the Antarctic while bailing out one of my daughter's field trips." A small box materialises on the table in front of him. "My gift to you. And while I make no demands, I would respectfully recommend that you use it for something which demonstrates to the rest of the world that which I already know; that you are a great untapped resource."

He picks up the box, staring at it and presumably running some sort of scanner over it. It's not critically important because he's not actually here, but there's such a thing as keeping up appearances.

Satisfied, he opens it, revealing the small ingots of Antarctic vibranium I recovered from the Savage Land. I've… Chosen not to tell T'Challa that I copied the machines he uses for processing it.

He stares for a moment and then closes the box, keeping it firmly grasped in his left hand. "Doom accepts this tribute, and shall consider what you have said. Now GO."

I down the last of the chocolate as I rise to my feet, leave the.. last of my Latverian currency as a tip along with the cup, pick up the pastry, bow deferentially to His Majesty Doctor Victor von Doom, King of Latveria, and then transition to my fallback point just outside of Latveria.

I thought that went w-.

You have twenty one messages.

Because of course private communications aren't a thing in Latveria.

Are they all from the same person?

Yes.

Is it Janet?

Yes.

Because of course it is.

Just call Janet.

Calling 'Jan-

"She's not going to the prom!"

-et'.

"Janet, hi, sorry I couldn't-"

"She's not going to the prom, Paul! The PROM!"

"-pick up. And… Um, okay? Did she-"

"It's tomorrow! She can't not go to the prom! It's social suicide!"

"-say why? I-. If there's no one that she wants to go with-."

"It's because-. She doesn't want to go if she can't touch the guy she's with. I thought Hank's force field fixed that?"

"It's not a hundred percent reliable. It would cover hand-holding fairly reliably for a few hours, but after that-."

"But it's not even that bad!"

"She's a bit fixated, but don't panic. I know someone she can go with."

"Ah, I don't think sending Leech to a mutant school-."

"No, not Leech."

"Good, because he's not a bad guy? But she's kinda totally out of his league. Wait, you're not thinking of Sebastian-?"

"No? He's my age. Just-. Leave it with me. Just… Help her with her dress and whatever else she needs. I'll be back in about an hour."

"Okay. Okay. Consider it managed. Just make sure he's… Good."

"I will. Thank you, Janet. You're indispensable."