Well, at least the peanut gallery is enjoying themselves.
OL? You, uh, wanna say something? OL?
Uh, Ring, you want to reboot OL now?
Even the Amazons are getting worried. Wow.
Seriously, is he all right? <grabs a stick for poking>
…
…
"Are-? Are you alright?"
<poke> Anything? No? <poke>
Okay, time for percussive maintenance. Someone wanna whack him one, ladies?
Oh, hey, there he goes. Looks like he finally rebooted.
12th April
10:08 GMT
I appear in the Spider Guild's base, physical Koriand'r replacing construct Koriand'r.
And probably surprising her a little.
"Lantern Koriand'r, could-."
The young Guilder jumps at me, and I gently catch… Her? In a construct bubble.
"Could you please explain this?"
Yes please! Enlighten us!
The young Guilder waves all four of her forelimbs at me.
"Hello Daddy!"
"Rather urgently."
Seriously, Kori, why are you not talking? Make with the mouth-noise thing quick-quick!
"The Spider Queen is an expert in biological engineering-."
"No. No. There is no way that human and Guilder genetics are similar enough to make hybridisation possible even if she somehow got a genetic sample from me, and I don't think that she ever got the opportunity."
Yeah, did he ever drop his environmental field in the spider-queen's presence at any point in his interactions with her? Because that is the only way they could have gotten any DNA traces.
"No, she-"
The young Guilder tries running up the side of the bubble, fails, then tumbles backwards to the bottom.
"Owie."
Oh, god, the cute is strong with this one...
"-was created by the Queen. She designed the child's mind based on the lessons you wrote in the book you gave her. Her intent was to create someone who would instinctively make a good Orange Lantern."
"Okay, that's-"
Logical enough. So the 'Daddy' thing is a respect thing then.
I take a moment to get a better look at the young Guilder as she picks herself up. Now that I look, there are several divergences between her morphology and a typical Guilder. No hair, though that could just be an age thing. The hard edges of her carapace and smoother and more rounded, and rather than a dull yellow-brown she's a more appealing peach.
So not as creepy-crawly arachnophobe-triggering spidery. But not more humanoid? Odd choice.
"-not too surprising." Considering what I did in the time that I was here, it makes perfect sense that she'd want someone to join us if that was at all possible. That wasn't why I gave her the book, but from her point of view creating a specialised strain makes more sense than teaching a non-specialised individual. "Why is she calling me 'Daddy'?"
Again, logical. Why even assume a non-specialised Guilder could manage to achieve the mindset?
The Guilder in question gets her feet back under her and stands facing me.
"Because I need to be the bestest Lantern ever and that means I need to learn from you!"
"Okay! Okay. Okay. Congratulations, you made about a hundred Themyscirans laugh harder than they have in over a thousand years."
Honestly, given the chattiness of the Amazons, the story will already have spread across Themyscira. He's gonna be called 'Arachneros' by people who weren't even in the city that day from now on...
She moves her pedipalps into a configuration which makes it look like she's smiling.
"Yay!"
<Shudder>
Oh god, if she keeps that up I'll need Diabeetus meds...
"However, I will warn you now that if I decide to offer you a ring-" And if I don't and Dox hears about this then he will. "-it will not be until you are physiologically mature."
"Not-yay!"
And this is why she's not getting a ring yet. Also: Stop being so damn cute!
Ring, updated internal map… Thank you.
"Lantern Koriand'r, can I assume that you brought this matter to my attention the moment you found out about it?"
She nods. "That is what I did."
Oh, thank goodness, news is unlikely to have spread far, then...
"Thank you, that was the correct thing to do." She smiles. "I'm going to talk to the Queen now. You're free to remain, or attend to your other duties."
"I.. think that I would like to remain."
She better be taping every second of this. If only to share with the other Lanterns. It'd be great for morale in the rookies.
"Very well."
I rise of the floor of… Looks like a… Gymnasium? And head out into the main corridor, the young Guilder's bubble floating along-
"Wee!"
Seriously, how old is she? Mentally, I mean; she can't be more than a couple of months out of the egg...
-besides me. The facility has grown since my last visit, but they appear to be expanding their facilities on the surface rather than digging down further. That makes sense; they don't feel the need for kilometres of rock between them and a potential orbital bombardment. And it makes it easier for them to offer additional services to their customers.
In more ways than one, if you know what I mean...
I wonder if they've considered a space elevator? Or several? Moving large quantities of raw material into orbit costs a lot of energy if you're using teleporters. Though I.. suppose that they don't have a lot of the restrictions on energy generation techniques that I'm used to on Earth.
And Space Elevators tend to be big investments in time, materials and energy, even for advanced civilisations like this.
"Young lady, what-"
"Yes, Daddy?"
"-is-? Why are you calling me that?"
Poor guy, he's just not ready for fatherhood, is he? At least the Renegade has some practice now, between the Succuvamps and Lynne...
"Because you're the bestest-."
"Plenty of Lanterns think that I'm the best and want to learn from me without calling me 'Daddy'."
And now Corps member are going to call him Daddy, once they hear about this, for the lols... Looks like Dox isn't going to have to worry too much about people respecting OL more than him now...
"You told Mummy what to put in me! There's no way Mummy would have made me if she hadn't met you."
"She might have made a Guilder like you who had completely resolute will instead."
"And then she could call Green Man 'Daddy' or Guy Gardner 'Daddy'. I think he'd be a good Daddy. But she wouldn't be me, and the first thing I want is to exist."
Huh, she probably could, couldn't she? Though I doubt the Green Rings' seeker protocols would consider them a good target unless no-one else were closer, given the Spider Guild's reputation elsewhere.
"Existing is generally a good place to start. Did the Queen mention that I can see other people's emotions?"
"It was in the book."
Which she probably knows as well as she does the hairs on her hands... Given it's wired into her psyche...
We fly over a group of Guilders, whose mandibles click nervously when they see me.
"So..?"
Her body droops.
And she's smart too. The Queen really pulled out all the stops with her...
"So you can see the real reasons why I want things."
"And?"
"And I call you 'Daddy' to try and make you feel responsible so that you'll agree to teach me."
Honest, too. Though given that OL can see her subterfuge, there's no reason to hide it, is there?
"Please remember that I don't like people lying to me."
"And the real reason why I'm this colour and why my face looks like this is so you'll find me cute!"
That's a matter of opinion...
The behaviour helps, I suppose...
"That's an uphill struggles you've got there. Couldn't the Queen have altered your physiology more radically? There are plenty of humanoid species with pseudo-insectoid physiological traits."
"But that wouldn't help the rest of the Nest! If I don't look like a Spider they'll just say 'oh, some random humanoid did something good' and keep on thinking that the Spider Guild is evil!"
Huh.
That
actually makes good sense.
"The Spider Guild does eat people."
"Then I need to show them a new way of doing things, too!"
The optimism is admirable, but it's a big hill to climb...
We reach the outer blast door leading to the Queen's chamber, and I land in front of the guard.
"I think you know why I'm here."
They cringe slightly.
"The Queen will see you at once."
I should think so... She's gonna have some 'splainin' to do, Lucy...
