10th October 2012
06:21 GMT
Should I apologise, or not?
I don't know enough about-.
"Are you still-" Jade walks in, towelling her hair dry. "-wondering whether you should apologise or not?"
"Yes.
"
"Don't. She's spent more time living around humans than you have thanagarians. She has far more reason to know about human culture than you do to know thanagarian culture. And I'm sure that the League-"
She sits down on the bed, putting the towel down and picking up a brush.
"-spent more time talking about
you than you did Thanagar."
"Probably true. But, Batman told me to fix my relationships with the League members. And I.. tend to feel that as a superhero I-. It's not about doing the
least I could do, or what I'm
expected to do.
"
"I
know."
I look down at the duvet for a moment.
"I..
know. Everywhere we go, I try working. Um. I just-. It's a habit I've gotten into, and basically everywhere I've
gone is a place where I've had work to do. I don't really… I don't really
know other places.
"
"You like being a superhero."
"I like doing what I do. I like… Some kind of problem-of-the-week television series, you know? Go to somewhere strange and new, fix the underlying problems that they -for some reason- can't fix using my 'outsider powers'.
"
She gives me a small but curious frown.
"Is there really nothing else you do?"
I… Shrug, awkwardly.
"I did… Design an entire edition of Warhammer Forty Thousand?
"
"That's the.. wargame you and Zatanna cosplay, isn't it? With the-" She points her right forefinger at her dressing gown covered left breast. "-piercing."
"You'd have to point your hand in a lot more places than that. Yeah-yes, that's the one.
"
"Why?"
"Because I didn't like the rules as they were. It wasn't balanced, the costs didn't reflect the utility of different unit and weapon choices, they didn't even
bother balancing things between Codices, which is the entire
point of even
having point values, Games Workshop
uses effectiveness as a tool to get existing players to buy the new stuff, rather than properly balancing the game to encourage new players to take it up.
"
I slump a little.
"They've already started editing the perfectly balanced version I created. Did
they simulate billions of games while temporarily a god? I don't think so.
"
Ah…
"How-? How about you? Your newfound love of ballroom dancing notwithstanding?
"
"I… Usually spend the first part of any assignment learning about local culture. I go to their hangouts, shopping precincts, bars and clubs, museums and theatres, trying to get a feel for how they think."
"How their society works.
"
She nods. "When I was a Shadow, it was basic reconnaissance. Now, it's… More of a habit."
"Do you..? Like it?
"
"I-"
"Strange, alien-.
"
"-don't-" She shakes her head. "-know. I wouldn't like
not doing it, because it's part of the system-." She looks away for a moment, thinking about how to phrase it. "It's part of how I make sure that a place is safe. With aliens, I doubt I'm learning as much as my instincts
tell me I am, but it… Works. I still can't pass as native, but I could pass as someone who's been in the area for a while. And sometimes I pick up information related to our job."
"But it's still work. Or work-adjacent.
"
"When I started with the Shadows, I used to pick up a small doll whenever I went somewhere. At one point I had a small collection. But then we had to get out of a safe house in a hurry and they all got left behind. I didn't bother getting any more after that. It wasn't really a lifestyle that lent itself to materialism. How about reading?"
"Reading? Oh. Ah, not really. I mean, I used to read science fiction and fantasy, and now…
"
I shrug, and she nods.
"I read his-. No, I have my ring shove the contents of history books into my brain. That's not really the same.
"
"I read briefing documents. They've offered me cybernetic implants to do what your ring does, but that always sounds like a bad idea."
"If the Director's cleared them, then they're almost certainly safe for humanoids. But I can understand not wanting to alter your mind like that.
"
She nods. "Exactly."
"Again. I-.
"
"It's fine." She looks me directly in the eyes. "If anything, it makes it easier for me to see who's had their mind altered by the Reach and who hasn't. There's no amount of empathy that would stop me killing someone who's been
twisted like that. They're not
themselves any more."
…
"I
am. I may be a little
nicer, but I'm still me."
"Good show.
"
She thinks for a moment.
"So far this hasn't worked. We're doing
different work, but that wasn't what we're trying to do."
"I'm open to ideas.
"
Jade puts down her brush.
"Teach me how to play Warhammer Forty Thousand."
I nod.
"Which edit-?
" I blink.
"What?
"
"It has different editions? How long as it been out for?"
My face involuntarily relaxes, my mouth falling slightly open.
"What?
I don't have any better ideas. I'm interested in what a 'perfectly balanced' game looks like."
"Get thee behind me, foul temptress."
She crosses her arms, looking at me incredulously.
"Is this what gate keeping feels like? 'No girls allowed'?"
"Alright.
"
I stand up and take a display table that I haven't meticulously prepared to display the iconic elements of each faction along with a selection of
properly scaled titans. I walk around behind it like a salesman displaying his wares as she gets up off the bed and walks over to look at the Black Templars.
"Space gothic knights?"
"Heh.
"
"What?"
"A bit of an old meme.
If your girlfriend's standing on the other side of the table wearing a dressing gown but you noticed the miniatures first, you're in the right place.
"
"You're not wearing a shirt and I'm looking at the models."
I smile warmly.
"And I wouldn't have it any other way.
"
Though I'm sure the fellow (or lady, it doesn't mention) is depicted with suitably heroic physique...
