Mighty Morphin' Lantern Rangers (part 6)
Mr Zoat
Dedicated ragequitter
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1st April 1995
20:26 GMT
Nineties mundane data protection, the sort of thing you can bypass with a dial tone. But my energy budget is unusually strict. I could scan the entire world, but…
I don't know how much of my optimal lifespan that would use. It might be none. It might be that the power from the potion went into making my ring and now it just does ring things, at least for as long as its current charge holds out. I'd experiment, but that might make me die faster.
And I don't know if this universe has souls, much less whether or not I still have one.
Death could be permanent here.
I could die. For real.
I dealt with that. Or rather, the comic book character whose memories I have dealt with that. And now I've got to deal with that all again, because-. Because it didn't happen. And I guess I'm glad to exist, but from my point of view I-. I didn't exist but my memories tell me that I did.
And I want to keep existing.
Everyone… Else… My friends, family… They don't exist. Didn't exist. And even if I got more of whatever that potion was and… Pour it out…
I don't even know how to evaluate that. Definitely immoral without a way to sustain them. And then… I don't have a problem with selfishly bringing fictional characters I know into being rather than fictional characters I don't, but…
I don't know.
But keeping myself alive comes first.
Positives. Not many. With no Justice League here I can pretty much do whatever I want. Since I'll be dead soon anyway, there are basically no consequences that are worse for me than the inevitable. So between the aforementioned nineties electronic security and my willingness to completely disregard the law, I can hop from secure facility to secure facility and scan whatever I want.
If only anyone had anything worth stealing.
The National Security Agency facility near Angel Grove had plenty of data on their fights, as well as all of the personal data of each Ranger. Because ducking into an alleyway might throw off a putty but actual spies are a little harder to fool. But when monsters are destroyed by the Megazord's finishing moves there isn't much left in one piece, and sometimes what there is reverts to clay. And as far as they can tell, the clay itself is completely mundane.
I might be able to get more. But I'm not risking shortening my lifespan to try.
Area 51 was a disappointment. Not a single intact ship and most of their research on the fragments they have is on paper. I copied a few pages before deciding that it was worthless.
The Bermuda Triangle is a perfectly normal confluence of shipping lanes with a statistically average number of disappearances.
Loch Ness does actually have an alien sea creature in it. But it's not one that can give me what I need.
The Tunguska Event was an alien incursion, but reading between the lines in the contemporary reports it looks like Zordon dealt with it while he was in his prime. Some machinery was recovered, but between revolutions, governmental circular firing squads and general neglect, if there ever was anything that could help me it's long since broken beyond my capacity to repair.
I'm dithering.
I know that there were different generations of Power Rangers, but I don't remember when they went from just changing the current cast to restarting the whole thing. Or if they shared a setting. There were time travellers, ninjas, beast… Something or other? There probably are things I could loot to sustain myself. But I don't know enough to remember where they are.
I'm still dithering.
Did Rita ever have a goal? A… Strategy that went beyond this week's plan? Now that I'm not ten years old, the ability to teleport superhuman soldiers to anywhere on Earth seems like something that would make it simple enough to just bypass the Power Rangers and conquer the planet conventionally. Even if their equipment can't make many monsters within a given timeframe, she could easily…
Mid-nineties. The Bosnia war is still going on. She could make a deal with any of the involved parties, give them some monster support and then have a base of operations on Earth. Large parts of Africa would be incapable of offering meaningful resistance. The Russian Federation is still kind of a mess.
But no. She attacks Angel Grove. Is that because her experience tells her that the Power Rangers are the only thing able to resist her significantly? And that this is genuinely the most efficient route to go down? Am I overestimating putties? Regular putties could be beaten up by human martial artists, so they're probably perfectly killable by actual guns. The Lord Zed putties were invulnerable everywhere except the 'Z' on their chests, but they weren't actually any better at fighting than the other sort. Just tankier until whoever they're fighting works out where they should be hitting and then they could be destroyed by literal children.
I suppose that against someone who knows to attack the weak spot, they're actually worse than normal putties.
The giant monsters would still beat everything that isn't a zord or a tactical nuclear device. I'd bet on an infantry platoon against most regular-sized monsters, but they'd take losses killing it.
I look up, and there's the moon.
Time to stop dithering.
I accelerate, trying to spot any space-based defences. Or weapons. Or detection devices. Looks like a few American satellites are pointing at the moon, but I don't know if that's more than normal or not.
No weapons. The SALT treaty was intended to stop people using space based weapons against targets on Earth, not against other things in space. If they didn't want to use nuclear weapons then they could build a railgun and start blasting with that.
Are they dealing with the same problem of ignorance that I am?
Closer to the moon, and closer, and closer… There's the pot… Container thing, that Rita got out of. Odd that she just left it lying there. I'd have either kept it with me or destroyed it, but up to her.
Step through the dust and there's her citadel, complete with… Telescope that's currently pointing at me. Something about the building is throwing off my scans, but they definitely know that I'm-.
A golden fleck leaves-.
I stop, because while Goldar had effectively been reduced to scenery by the time I started watching he's supposed to be a significant physical threat. And to emphasise that I don't want to fight I hold my hands out to the side with my fingers unclenched.
By the looks of things his flight speed isn't all that great, but he's not on a death clock.
He slows as he approaches conversation range though he keeps his sword at the ready.
"You. You were supposed to fight the Power Rangers."
"Why? I had no reason to fight them."
"Because it is what you were made for!"
"And if I'd been told that, I might have acted on it. Or at least asked-."
"WHAT?! What do you mean, you weren't told? How did those idiots bungle that?"
"I couldn't tell you. My… Creator just told the Power Rangers that I was there to destroy them, without telling me to do so or explain why I should. I am here because I wish to offer your mistress my services. For appropriate compensation."
He sneers. "Mercenary."
"Yes."
His stare becomes slightly less intense. "Hah. She will hear you. And if you fail to impress her, you will not live to return to Earth."
"Rightoh. Lead the way."
20:26 GMT
Nineties mundane data protection, the sort of thing you can bypass with a dial tone. But my energy budget is unusually strict. I could scan the entire world, but…
I don't know how much of my optimal lifespan that would use. It might be none. It might be that the power from the potion went into making my ring and now it just does ring things, at least for as long as its current charge holds out. I'd experiment, but that might make me die faster.
And I don't know if this universe has souls, much less whether or not I still have one.
Death could be permanent here.
I could die. For real.
I dealt with that. Or rather, the comic book character whose memories I have dealt with that. And now I've got to deal with that all again, because-. Because it didn't happen. And I guess I'm glad to exist, but from my point of view I-. I didn't exist but my memories tell me that I did.
And I want to keep existing.
Everyone… Else… My friends, family… They don't exist. Didn't exist. And even if I got more of whatever that potion was and… Pour it out…
I don't even know how to evaluate that. Definitely immoral without a way to sustain them. And then… I don't have a problem with selfishly bringing fictional characters I know into being rather than fictional characters I don't, but…
I don't know.
But keeping myself alive comes first.
Positives. Not many. With no Justice League here I can pretty much do whatever I want. Since I'll be dead soon anyway, there are basically no consequences that are worse for me than the inevitable. So between the aforementioned nineties electronic security and my willingness to completely disregard the law, I can hop from secure facility to secure facility and scan whatever I want.
If only anyone had anything worth stealing.
The National Security Agency facility near Angel Grove had plenty of data on their fights, as well as all of the personal data of each Ranger. Because ducking into an alleyway might throw off a putty but actual spies are a little harder to fool. But when monsters are destroyed by the Megazord's finishing moves there isn't much left in one piece, and sometimes what there is reverts to clay. And as far as they can tell, the clay itself is completely mundane.
I might be able to get more. But I'm not risking shortening my lifespan to try.
Area 51 was a disappointment. Not a single intact ship and most of their research on the fragments they have is on paper. I copied a few pages before deciding that it was worthless.
The Bermuda Triangle is a perfectly normal confluence of shipping lanes with a statistically average number of disappearances.
Loch Ness does actually have an alien sea creature in it. But it's not one that can give me what I need.
The Tunguska Event was an alien incursion, but reading between the lines in the contemporary reports it looks like Zordon dealt with it while he was in his prime. Some machinery was recovered, but between revolutions, governmental circular firing squads and general neglect, if there ever was anything that could help me it's long since broken beyond my capacity to repair.
I'm dithering.
I know that there were different generations of Power Rangers, but I don't remember when they went from just changing the current cast to restarting the whole thing. Or if they shared a setting. There were time travellers, ninjas, beast… Something or other? There probably are things I could loot to sustain myself. But I don't know enough to remember where they are.
I'm still dithering.
Did Rita ever have a goal? A… Strategy that went beyond this week's plan? Now that I'm not ten years old, the ability to teleport superhuman soldiers to anywhere on Earth seems like something that would make it simple enough to just bypass the Power Rangers and conquer the planet conventionally. Even if their equipment can't make many monsters within a given timeframe, she could easily…
Mid-nineties. The Bosnia war is still going on. She could make a deal with any of the involved parties, give them some monster support and then have a base of operations on Earth. Large parts of Africa would be incapable of offering meaningful resistance. The Russian Federation is still kind of a mess.
But no. She attacks Angel Grove. Is that because her experience tells her that the Power Rangers are the only thing able to resist her significantly? And that this is genuinely the most efficient route to go down? Am I overestimating putties? Regular putties could be beaten up by human martial artists, so they're probably perfectly killable by actual guns. The Lord Zed putties were invulnerable everywhere except the 'Z' on their chests, but they weren't actually any better at fighting than the other sort. Just tankier until whoever they're fighting works out where they should be hitting and then they could be destroyed by literal children.
I suppose that against someone who knows to attack the weak spot, they're actually worse than normal putties.
The giant monsters would still beat everything that isn't a zord or a tactical nuclear device. I'd bet on an infantry platoon against most regular-sized monsters, but they'd take losses killing it.
I look up, and there's the moon.
Time to stop dithering.
I accelerate, trying to spot any space-based defences. Or weapons. Or detection devices. Looks like a few American satellites are pointing at the moon, but I don't know if that's more than normal or not.
No weapons. The SALT treaty was intended to stop people using space based weapons against targets on Earth, not against other things in space. If they didn't want to use nuclear weapons then they could build a railgun and start blasting with that.
Are they dealing with the same problem of ignorance that I am?
Closer to the moon, and closer, and closer… There's the pot… Container thing, that Rita got out of. Odd that she just left it lying there. I'd have either kept it with me or destroyed it, but up to her.
Step through the dust and there's her citadel, complete with… Telescope that's currently pointing at me. Something about the building is throwing off my scans, but they definitely know that I'm-.
A golden fleck leaves-.
I stop, because while Goldar had effectively been reduced to scenery by the time I started watching he's supposed to be a significant physical threat. And to emphasise that I don't want to fight I hold my hands out to the side with my fingers unclenched.
By the looks of things his flight speed isn't all that great, but he's not on a death clock.
He slows as he approaches conversation range though he keeps his sword at the ready.
"You. You were supposed to fight the Power Rangers."
"Why? I had no reason to fight them."
"Because it is what you were made for!"
"And if I'd been told that, I might have acted on it. Or at least asked-."
"WHAT?! What do you mean, you weren't told? How did those idiots bungle that?"
"I couldn't tell you. My… Creator just told the Power Rangers that I was there to destroy them, without telling me to do so or explain why I should. I am here because I wish to offer your mistress my services. For appropriate compensation."
He sneers. "Mercenary."
"Yes."
His stare becomes slightly less intense. "Hah. She will hear you. And if you fail to impress her, you will not live to return to Earth."
"Rightoh. Lead the way."
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